NO, you may not feel me up

And no, you PUNK, you may not rub your thigh against mine, Or try and slide your hand up my arm or waist or any other part of me. This is public transportation and I am as much entitled to a decent ride home as you.

And yes, the wind is blowing. And yes, the T-shirt is clinging to my breasts. And no, that does mean that you should stare at them. And that cheap, annoying lip smacking sound you are making and that funny action with your mouth you are doing at me from way over there across the street, seriously stop it , you retard.

And, no, 55 year old Uncle ji, just because you keep driving up to my autorickshaw, rolling down the window of your fancy car , raising your eyebrows at me and smiling, does not mean that I will hop off the auto and into your car and where ever else you desire me to hop into. You might have a fancy car but it's definitely not working for your delusional 55 year old sorry self. Uncleji, go home to your family. And no, you two SRK wannabes who never will be, I will not hop off my auto onto your bike too. So you might as well stop or else you will also end up as delusional as delusional Uncleji.

And no please do not $%^&* break into some choli song when I walk by, or maro some sleazy comment, or smack your lips or scratch your crotch or your bum or breathe heavy or smile or leer or or make any other kind of obscene #@%&*( gesture that only a sleazy Ahole like you can think of.

Because honestly, while you might think that by doing so, you are sending out some sexy vibe to me which shall make me feel this desire for you or whatever else it is that you think I am thinking, all I am thinking is how someone should grab you by the balls and expel you into the horrors of hell so that you rot there and die and never plague thi world again.

There, that's what I am thinking, you retarded, delusional, wannabe sleazoids. So stop.

Just some rants over the "eve teasing" (oh, so understated) scenarios in Delhi.